buffer overflow

i feel it burning inside me
trying to ooze it’s way out
building up like a bomb
i just hope it doesn’t go off

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i know you’re right here
but you feel so far away
there’s nothing i can do
i can’t even move
the beating of my heart
overwhelms my thoughts
i can’t stand the distance
and i fall down

i know you’re right here
but i can’t hold you
my hands are tied
bound by your heart
just want you in my arms
to hold and protect
but life loses meaning
and my arms are empty

i know you’re right here
i can see it in your eyes
the beauty runs deep
into your heart and mind
but i feel my eyes are closed doors
shutting out what’s inside
and now it all comes out
as i cry

i know you’re right here
laying right next to me
but there’s nothing to hold
no warmth to share
it makes the nights long
when they violently arrive
makes the dawn dark
as i slip out of consciousness

i know you’re right here
as i lay on my side
bound, weeping and unaware
but you seem so far away

i just want you right here
pick me up, wake me
untie me, dry my tears
but you’re so far away

i just hope you can be right here

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darkness begins to surround me
and i fall deeper
wondering if i’ll ever
see light again

don’t want to be down here
don’t want to feel pain
don’t want to look to the sky
and believe that’s all there is

just want to be with you
just want to be embraced
just want only the best
for our hearts

scared of being so far down
scared of climbing out
scared that my efforts
might pull the bricks cascading

will you help me escape
or will you simply wave
will you be my savior
or my undoing

only time will tell
as i laboriously ascend
though i do not deny aid
on my journey towards the hope

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wandering through the dark
looking for a light
i find another traveler
we hold hands tight

now we are a team
combining our power
guiding us on
to the sanctuary of the tower

the journey continues
wavering but strong and true
relentless and without fault
appears to only one of the two

in the darkest part of emptiness
i look to carry on
but the traveler i was with
... gone

i still see them traveling
as i sit and cry
too scared to carry on
just scream and wonder why

the traveler continues
straying from their course
towards the tower they do not go
no signs of remorse

pained and broken
i rise from my knees
tear me inside out
make it stop please

reconstruct the spirit within
put it back in place
the tears that crack the arid earth
no longer fall from my face

wandering again with destination in sight
unsure of the true track
with the other traveler in vision
trek on, towards the black

we travel together
though not hand in hand
one helping the other
to simply understand

what is this life i lead?
nothing but a campaign
to the mighty tower ahead
through all the laughs and pain

and when the destination has been reached
and we reflect the past
we see it to be for the best
the memories we cast

we may not arrive together
we may arrive hearts intertwined
the future i cannot see
but i am not blind

uncertain is the path ahead
but i face it strong and without fear
through the black i travel
my sight, a little more clear
—
make the best of everything. the journey is only over if you want it to be.

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separate the pain
remove and reorder it
separate the pain

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the hope strangles me tight
want to hold her but she runs
will i be the end

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