Commentaries on Sleeping with Somebody
May 22nd 2007
First off, this is about sleeping with somebody, as in next to them, over night, in bed. Not doing dirty things with your cash and prizes (thanks Dane).
Second, this isn’t exactly rocket science. Anybody who’s slept with anybody has probably experienced this just maybe never thought about it.
Also, I’m going to simply say things like ‘women’ and ‘men’, simply because I am a guy and I’m way too lazy to type this politically correct like. This theory works equally well with any combination of men/women.
So anyway, this theory works on the premise of curves. I’ll come right out and say it: curves are wicked. Women have amazing curves, especially in the waist/hips and posterior area. I’m pretty sure curves of that nature are basically the greatest thing ever. Well scratch that…second greatest thing ever. Air is basically the greatest thing ever, since it is appropriate 100% of the time. Curves are appropriate about 99.998% of the time. That 0.002% is the time when you just need to sleep. Sometimes you just need to sleep. It’s no secret that the times you just need to sleep increase as you get older. Most people don’t get enough sleep in their daily lives (I have nothing to back that statement up…it’s just one of those common knowledge things I think), and all this sleep piles up. (hmm…maybe that’s why you die…you just don’t sleep enough until one day when you sleep forever…a new outlook on death…I must ponder this).
Okay, so you climb into bed, and you climb in next to your significant other. You cuddle up next to them. Spooning. Nothing wrong with spooning. It’s great, and you don’t even have to be seeing the person to do it. But the inherent problem (which is also the best part) with spooning, is the fact that this position, shows off the curves. When you lie on your side like that, your back bends in a horribly inergonomic way, but it emphasizes the curves on the other side of the body. Hot damn. Like I said though, when you want to sleep, this is a problem. You’re tired, maybe you had a long day, maybe you’ve got a long day ahead of you, and there is this hot human being you’re about to snuggle up next to. sigh All you want to do is sleep and the trouser troops start to march off to war.
This is where things happen. You can act, and start appreciating the curves. The problem with this is you must sleep. Maybe the person you are seducing needs to sleep. Maybe it goes over well and you have a hot night. Now you’re both tired the next day. If you act and it goes the other way, you run the risk of feeling rejected, and depending on the other person, they feel bad for making you feel this way.
If you don’t act, and you accept the fact you must sleep, the best way to avoid temptation is to just take your half of the bed, get into your comfy position, and sleep. Chances are, if you are trying to avoid temptation, you are probably not cuddled up next to said other person. The problem with this is, depending on how the other person was feeling that night, they might feel rejected, and you might feel bad if they do. But at least you get your sleep.
Both of these scenarios have something in common: you never talk to the person.
Now we discuss the ways to avoid problems.
First of all, talk. If you are just hella tired and want to sleep, tell the person. Make sure they understand that despite the fact that you care about this person (right?), you still need your beauty rest. You don’t need to hump like rabbits every night. People don’t run on the same cycles, so it’s not fair to assume the other person is up for giggity every time you are. Granted, some nights, you might just be craving, and hey, the other person might not mind if you wrangle them out of their pre-sleep.
Second…okay there is no second. You must talk. You could just not talk and play the game every night, but that’s kind of cruel.
Actually the best way is to spend you time figuring out how to get through life without sleep, so then you can get jiggy all night long.
Regardless it’s still a pretty intense dilemma at times. This is just a small example of the kinds of things that keep me up at night.
So think about that next time you climb into bed with your significant other, or anyone for that matter.
